Thursday, December 31, 2009
New Year's Resolution
"My people and I have come to an agreement. They are to say what they please, and I am to do what I please." Frederick the Great 1712-1786
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
The Sacrament of Marriage vs. Cohabitation
By David G. Bonagura, Jr.
For years countless heroes, Catholic and not, sung and unsung, have labored courageously to save the institution of marriage from the onslaught of those who seek to redefine it. Behind this vociferous public attack from without, marriage is struggling against another, more insidious attack that threatens its continued existence from within: cohabitation. Unlike same-sex unions, which are visibly and obviously different from natural marriage, cohabitation shares many of the trappings of marriage: chores, bills, sex, and even children. The similarities have enticed many prospective brides and grooms to try cohabitation first: according to Our Sunday Visitor, today more than half of first marriages begin with cohabitation, which has led to a 1100 percent increase in cohabitation nationally since 1970.
But cohabitation is not marriage, and it is not a sacrament. The difference lies in the essence and purpose of each. Cohabitation is an at-will agreement to share a roof and a bed for as long as both parties are satisfied. Unlike traditional marriage, which requires legal registry and witnesses because of its public dimension, cohabitation is a private affair. While marriage publicly declares that two individuals have united to raise children for the common good, cohabitation, in the analysis of Prof. Robert George, values sex as an instrumental good – as a means to some other good for two individuals who remain autonomous in every way except their address. Due to the prevalence and tacit acceptance of cohabitation today, many couples who enter into this state do not have malicious intent; some do not even suspect that it is wrong. Nevertheless, the decision to cohabitate says that one has placed himself or herself and his or her sexual desires ahead of everyone and everything else, including the cohabiting partner.
The sexual revolution has labored mightily to discredit, dismiss, and bury the Church’s understanding of marriage and sexuality, the final societal bulwark against complete sexual libertinism. The revolution has seduced Catholics as much as the general population. It is no secret that most Catholics continue to ignore the Church’s teaching against birth control, that more engaged couples are foregoing a Church wedding, and that many of those who are married in the Church have consummated their union long before they approach the altar. Against such realities, the Church can do little more than put forward her vision of marriage in the hope that it will be heard. Thoughtful reflection may well find the Church’s teaching refreshing – and compelling.
The Catechism of the Catholic Church describes marriage as a creation of a loving God who has called men and women to love as the fundamental purpose of their existence. Since men and women are created in the image and likeness of God, “their mutual love becomes an image of the absolute and unfailing love with which God loves man.” The union of husband and wife reflects the union of God with His people, and, in the analogy of St. Paul, the union of Christ the bridegroom with His bride, the Church.
Marriage, then, is a sacrament established by Christ, who enabled married couples to overcome the burden of original sin by personally granting the couple “the strength and grace to live marriage in the new dimension of the Reign of God” (CCC 1615). The grace of the sacrament unites a couple by virtue of their mutual consent in an indissoluble bond so that they may “help one another to attain holiness in their married life and in welcoming and educating their children” (1641). From the grace of the sacrament comes the capacity to love, to forgive, to comfort, to support, and to nurture each other on all occasions, in every season. Like the grace of baptism and confirmation, both newlyweds and golden jubilarians can call upon and strengthen the grace of marriage through prayer, through the sacraments of reconciliation and Eucharist, and through natural activities – from romantic dinners to painting the house – done in a spirit of mutual love and charity.
The sexual union of the spouses, intended for procreation and for strengthening the bond between them, is the physical expression of the essence of marriage: the complete gift of oneself to another. In their wedding vows, couples freely promise to love each completely, exclusively, and faithfully in hope that their marriage will bear the fruit of children. Christopher West, who has synthesized for popular audiences Pope John Paul II’s “theology of the body,” a profound meditation on the meaning of the complete gift of self in marital union, describes each sexual act of married couples as a renewal of wedding vows. For this reason the Church teaches that sex belongs only in marriage, for only then is the act free, total, faithful, and fruitful. This is also the reason for the Church’s condemnation of artificial birth control: it prevents, whether through physical or chemical means, the free and total giving of self that bears fruit in another human life.
The visions of sex and marriage offered by the Church and by cohabitation could not be more different. Pope John Paul II often said that the Church only proposes; she imposes nothing. We remain free to choose – or not – the revealed path to authentic love.
David G. Bonagura, Jr. is associate editor of The University Bookman. This is the fifth column in a series on the sacraments of the Church.
For years countless heroes, Catholic and not, sung and unsung, have labored courageously to save the institution of marriage from the onslaught of those who seek to redefine it. Behind this vociferous public attack from without, marriage is struggling against another, more insidious attack that threatens its continued existence from within: cohabitation. Unlike same-sex unions, which are visibly and obviously different from natural marriage, cohabitation shares many of the trappings of marriage: chores, bills, sex, and even children. The similarities have enticed many prospective brides and grooms to try cohabitation first: according to Our Sunday Visitor, today more than half of first marriages begin with cohabitation, which has led to a 1100 percent increase in cohabitation nationally since 1970.
But cohabitation is not marriage, and it is not a sacrament. The difference lies in the essence and purpose of each. Cohabitation is an at-will agreement to share a roof and a bed for as long as both parties are satisfied. Unlike traditional marriage, which requires legal registry and witnesses because of its public dimension, cohabitation is a private affair. While marriage publicly declares that two individuals have united to raise children for the common good, cohabitation, in the analysis of Prof. Robert George, values sex as an instrumental good – as a means to some other good for two individuals who remain autonomous in every way except their address. Due to the prevalence and tacit acceptance of cohabitation today, many couples who enter into this state do not have malicious intent; some do not even suspect that it is wrong. Nevertheless, the decision to cohabitate says that one has placed himself or herself and his or her sexual desires ahead of everyone and everything else, including the cohabiting partner.
The sexual revolution has labored mightily to discredit, dismiss, and bury the Church’s understanding of marriage and sexuality, the final societal bulwark against complete sexual libertinism. The revolution has seduced Catholics as much as the general population. It is no secret that most Catholics continue to ignore the Church’s teaching against birth control, that more engaged couples are foregoing a Church wedding, and that many of those who are married in the Church have consummated their union long before they approach the altar. Against such realities, the Church can do little more than put forward her vision of marriage in the hope that it will be heard. Thoughtful reflection may well find the Church’s teaching refreshing – and compelling.
The Catechism of the Catholic Church describes marriage as a creation of a loving God who has called men and women to love as the fundamental purpose of their existence. Since men and women are created in the image and likeness of God, “their mutual love becomes an image of the absolute and unfailing love with which God loves man.” The union of husband and wife reflects the union of God with His people, and, in the analogy of St. Paul, the union of Christ the bridegroom with His bride, the Church.
Marriage, then, is a sacrament established by Christ, who enabled married couples to overcome the burden of original sin by personally granting the couple “the strength and grace to live marriage in the new dimension of the Reign of God” (CCC 1615). The grace of the sacrament unites a couple by virtue of their mutual consent in an indissoluble bond so that they may “help one another to attain holiness in their married life and in welcoming and educating their children” (1641). From the grace of the sacrament comes the capacity to love, to forgive, to comfort, to support, and to nurture each other on all occasions, in every season. Like the grace of baptism and confirmation, both newlyweds and golden jubilarians can call upon and strengthen the grace of marriage through prayer, through the sacraments of reconciliation and Eucharist, and through natural activities – from romantic dinners to painting the house – done in a spirit of mutual love and charity.
The sexual union of the spouses, intended for procreation and for strengthening the bond between them, is the physical expression of the essence of marriage: the complete gift of oneself to another. In their wedding vows, couples freely promise to love each completely, exclusively, and faithfully in hope that their marriage will bear the fruit of children. Christopher West, who has synthesized for popular audiences Pope John Paul II’s “theology of the body,” a profound meditation on the meaning of the complete gift of self in marital union, describes each sexual act of married couples as a renewal of wedding vows. For this reason the Church teaches that sex belongs only in marriage, for only then is the act free, total, faithful, and fruitful. This is also the reason for the Church’s condemnation of artificial birth control: it prevents, whether through physical or chemical means, the free and total giving of self that bears fruit in another human life.
The visions of sex and marriage offered by the Church and by cohabitation could not be more different. Pope John Paul II often said that the Church only proposes; she imposes nothing. We remain free to choose – or not – the revealed path to authentic love.
David G. Bonagura, Jr. is associate editor of The University Bookman. This is the fifth column in a series on the sacraments of the Church.
Monday, December 28, 2009
Midnight Mass Second Reading
The grace of God has appeared, saving all
and training us to reject godless ways and worldly desires
and to live temperately, justly, and devoutly in this age,
as we await the blessed hope,
the appearance of the glory of our great God
and savior Jesus Christ,
who gave himself for us to deliver us from all lawlessness
and to cleanse for himself a people as his own, eager to do what is good.
Titus 2:11-14
and training us to reject godless ways and worldly desires
and to live temperately, justly, and devoutly in this age,
as we await the blessed hope,
the appearance of the glory of our great God
and savior Jesus Christ,
who gave himself for us to deliver us from all lawlessness
and to cleanse for himself a people as his own, eager to do what is good.
Titus 2:11-14
Saturday, December 26, 2009
Thursday, December 24, 2009
Tuesday, December 22, 2009
Sunday, December 20, 2009
John Paul II; We love you!
Man cannot live without love. He remains a being that is incomprehensible for himself, his life is senseless, if love is not revealed to him, if he does not encounter love, if he does not experience it and make it his own, if he does not participate intimately in it.
Saturday, December 19, 2009
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Pope Benedict XVI has insisted again and again, faith and reason are not opposed. Faith “broadens reason.” St. Augustine point of departure was not the contrast between the two cities; it was the interaction between grace and rationalism. And for Augustine and the Catholic tradition, grace is not a concept or an abstraction describing a divine power granted to man by Christ, but Christ himself, his Incarnate Person, the man who died on the cross and rose again. Our task is not to struggle to be both rational and full of faith, but to share Christ’s life through the Church now and experience the harmony between faith and reason broadened by God’s love for us in Christ and our love for Him.
Monday, December 14, 2009
St. John of the Cross
"The blind man who falls will not get up again in his blindness, and if he does, he will take the wrong road."
Sunday, December 13, 2009
Saturday, December 12, 2009
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Confession Can Change the World
Posted by Webster
To set this world spinning the right way round, I think we Catholics might need to do just one thing: Start going to confession again. Then take our kids to confession. Once a month would be OK, once a week even better. Don't believe me? Listen to me brag about my fourth-grade CCD class.
I'm sure you could change the world if you could just get your kids alone to go to confession, as my fourth-graders did today. Stand and watch as each of them prepares in silence, goes nervously through the door into the sacristy, and comes out again with a huge grin and a “whew,” then settles down on a kneeler to say penance. You yourself would start going to confession again just because the whole thing is so impressive, so moving—and the kids look so happy when it's over.
Last week, we prepared for the Sacrament of Reconciliation by going over what you say and conducting a collective examination of conscience. I gave each child a piece of paper and a pencil, read them a series of questions, then told them after each question to write down any sins that occurred to them. Of course, their notes were "for their eyes only." Here are some of the questions:
Do I think of God and speak to Him by praying each day?
Do I use the Lord's name with reverence and love?
Do I attend Mass on Sunday or on Saturday afternoon?
Do I obey my parents and teachers quickly and cheerfully, or must I be reminded many times?
Do I obey the rules of home and school?
Am I kind to everyone?
Did I hit, kick, or in any way hurt others on purpose?
Do I make fun or say mean things to anyone?
Do I tell the truth?
There were more such questions on the list given to us CCD teachers to help our students prepare.
My kids have never been anything like this serious in any previous class. These kids chatter for a living. Suddenly, not a word. Last week, as I read the questions, they were hunched over their crib sheets like law school graduates over a bar exam. It was that intense. Biting their lips. Biting their erasers. Jiggling their feet nervously. And barely saying a word. Which is about as amazing as an entire amusement park going stone silent all at once.
I was very proud of the fourteen, out of sixteen, who showed up today. They could have blown it off, found any excuse to miss it. But I honestly think they wanted to come, even when they thought they didn't. Even C., who was waiting nervously in his mother's car as I walked up to the parish school building, where classes meet. His mom said he was nervous about confession and had lost his workbook for the second time. I crouched down to speak through the car window and tell C. that when I had my first confession two years ago, I was nervous as heck. I think I even used the word heck.
When attendance had been taken, Father Barnes led the way to the chapel in the convent next door to the parish school. He told the boys to remove their hats when entering the convent and showed boys and girls how to genuflect on their right knees before sitting in their pews. He asked them to be silent and prepare themselves while waiting their turn, and most were pretty good about keeping silence. Denise, the other fourth-grade teacher, and I counseled kids who looked especially nervous. Otherwise, there was that amazing, eerie phenomenon of thirty nine-year-old children sitting quietly for half an hour.
As each child came out of the sacristy, he or she pulled down the kneeler at their pew and said their penance. Then we walked back to our classrooms. I asked the children if anyone felt worse now than they did before confession. No one raised a hand. Who felt better? Everyone. Every single child.
Each child had an opportunity to talk about the experience. Then we ended with a prayer.
To set this world spinning the right way round, I think we Catholics might need to do just one thing: Start going to confession again. Then take our kids to confession. Once a month would be OK, once a week even better. Don't believe me? Listen to me brag about my fourth-grade CCD class.
I'm sure you could change the world if you could just get your kids alone to go to confession, as my fourth-graders did today. Stand and watch as each of them prepares in silence, goes nervously through the door into the sacristy, and comes out again with a huge grin and a “whew,” then settles down on a kneeler to say penance. You yourself would start going to confession again just because the whole thing is so impressive, so moving—and the kids look so happy when it's over.
Last week, we prepared for the Sacrament of Reconciliation by going over what you say and conducting a collective examination of conscience. I gave each child a piece of paper and a pencil, read them a series of questions, then told them after each question to write down any sins that occurred to them. Of course, their notes were "for their eyes only." Here are some of the questions:
Do I think of God and speak to Him by praying each day?
Do I use the Lord's name with reverence and love?
Do I attend Mass on Sunday or on Saturday afternoon?
Do I obey my parents and teachers quickly and cheerfully, or must I be reminded many times?
Do I obey the rules of home and school?
Am I kind to everyone?
Did I hit, kick, or in any way hurt others on purpose?
Do I make fun or say mean things to anyone?
Do I tell the truth?
There were more such questions on the list given to us CCD teachers to help our students prepare.
My kids have never been anything like this serious in any previous class. These kids chatter for a living. Suddenly, not a word. Last week, as I read the questions, they were hunched over their crib sheets like law school graduates over a bar exam. It was that intense. Biting their lips. Biting their erasers. Jiggling their feet nervously. And barely saying a word. Which is about as amazing as an entire amusement park going stone silent all at once.
I was very proud of the fourteen, out of sixteen, who showed up today. They could have blown it off, found any excuse to miss it. But I honestly think they wanted to come, even when they thought they didn't. Even C., who was waiting nervously in his mother's car as I walked up to the parish school building, where classes meet. His mom said he was nervous about confession and had lost his workbook for the second time. I crouched down to speak through the car window and tell C. that when I had my first confession two years ago, I was nervous as heck. I think I even used the word heck.
When attendance had been taken, Father Barnes led the way to the chapel in the convent next door to the parish school. He told the boys to remove their hats when entering the convent and showed boys and girls how to genuflect on their right knees before sitting in their pews. He asked them to be silent and prepare themselves while waiting their turn, and most were pretty good about keeping silence. Denise, the other fourth-grade teacher, and I counseled kids who looked especially nervous. Otherwise, there was that amazing, eerie phenomenon of thirty nine-year-old children sitting quietly for half an hour.
As each child came out of the sacristy, he or she pulled down the kneeler at their pew and said their penance. Then we walked back to our classrooms. I asked the children if anyone felt worse now than they did before confession. No one raised a hand. Who felt better? Everyone. Every single child.
Each child had an opportunity to talk about the experience. Then we ended with a prayer.
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Question
Should I tell those students who failed to attend Mass for the Immaculate Conception to not go to communion?
Missing a Holy Day of Obligation is a mortal sin.
It is not the child's fault if his parents did not take him to mass.
Missing a Holy Day of Obligation is a mortal sin.
It is not the child's fault if his parents did not take him to mass.
Tuesday, December 8, 2009
Monday, December 7, 2009
"Remember the sabbath day, to keep it holy"
* Deliberate failure of the Sunday obligation—The Christian Sunday (the Lord’s Day) celebrates the new life of the world born in Christ’s Resurrection. All humans have a duty, to praise God and give him thanks. Thus all Christians are bound to participate in the Mass, and must partake of the Eucharist at least on holy days of obligation. Deliberate failure to do this constitutes a grave sin (CCC 2181).
Sunday, December 6, 2009
The Distinction between two types of sin
All sin is an offense against God and a rejection of his perfect love and justice. Yet, Jesus makes a distinction between two types of sins. We call the most serious and grave sins, mortal sins. Mortal sins destroy the grace of God in the heart of the sinner. By their very grave nature, a mortal sin cuts our relationship off from God and turns man away from his creator. St. Paul’s letter to the Hebrews tell us that "if we sin willfully after having the knowledge of the truth, there is now left no sacrifice for sins" (Hebrews 10:26). The second type of sin, venial sin, that of less grave matter, does not cut us off from Christ. However, venial sin does weaken grace in the soul and damages our relationship with God. A person who frequently indulges in venial sin is very likely to collapse into mortal sin if they persist in their evil ways.
If you want more on this subject go here.
All sin is an offense against God and a rejection of his perfect love and justice. Yet, Jesus makes a distinction between two types of sins. We call the most serious and grave sins, mortal sins. Mortal sins destroy the grace of God in the heart of the sinner. By their very grave nature, a mortal sin cuts our relationship off from God and turns man away from his creator. St. Paul’s letter to the Hebrews tell us that "if we sin willfully after having the knowledge of the truth, there is now left no sacrifice for sins" (Hebrews 10:26). The second type of sin, venial sin, that of less grave matter, does not cut us off from Christ. However, venial sin does weaken grace in the soul and damages our relationship with God. A person who frequently indulges in venial sin is very likely to collapse into mortal sin if they persist in their evil ways.
If you want more on this subject go here.
Saturday, December 5, 2009
Philipians 1:4-6
Brothers and sisters:
I pray always with joy in my every prayer for all of you,
because of your partnership for the gospel
from the first day until now.
I am confident of this,
that the one who began a good work in you
will continue to complete it
until the day of Christ Jesus.
I pray always with joy in my every prayer for all of you,
because of your partnership for the gospel
from the first day until now.
I am confident of this,
that the one who began a good work in you
will continue to complete it
until the day of Christ Jesus.
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Postmodernism
I have been away for a few days. I hosted Thanksgiving. My mother, brother, two sisters, three nephews and four nieces came to visit for four days. I had a great time playing with the kids, but I did not get much done, so it was a great break.
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